A hilarious tragedy: A SWISS man died when he fell from a hotel balcony during a spitting match with a friend, a Swiss newspaper has reported. The daily Blick said the 29-year-old man took a run-up from inside the room so he could spit further, but lost his balance and plummeted 6.4m to the street [...]
“C’mon, you need to get on base here! Nelson Santovenia can’t ground into a double-play all by himself you know.”
Sure, his anti-zombie platform is near and dear to my heart, but nobody provides clear-headed triangulation like Hillary Clinton: FB: Now let’s go to the lightning round! Get out of Iraq or bomb Iran? CLINTON: Get out of Iraq by going through Iran! FB: End wiretapping or double Gitmo? CLINTON: Privatize wiretapping, then outsource Gitmo [...]
Ten great pharmaceutical names in search of a product: Cystuflex Pornulon-V Bonerbaker Stloosener Ogden’s Zit-gone-flake Pervdisemballer Slits-n-Jiggles Entitulatryx Extrowang Wartengorge Keep your eyes peeled in case any of these make it to market. I definitely want to assert prior art on the trademarks, if so.* * Note: I am not a lawyer, and know nothing [...]
Now that Hillary is all-but-defeated (watch out for the horror-movie-villainesque last clutch from her campaign, though), it’s time to put some thought into choices for Obama’s running mate. And by “put some thought into” I mean, of course, “pull some harebrained ideas out of my ass.” Here they are, in no particular order: Blacula. Pros: [...]
Jackée Ruggles King of Palindromes Booger Mud Buford A.L. Killer Carl The Sled The Candyman
You must reboot your computer after reading this post.
Some of these are recognizable as mimicing The Office. Others were inspired by different sources, and some were completely original. I was the main or sole perpetrator of many of them, was tangentially involved in a couple, and was the victim of only one. In chronological order: 1. Modified my boss’s browser so that when [...]
From the Associated Press: Akhenaten wasn’t the most manly pharaoh, even though he fathered at least a half-dozen children. In fact, his form was quite feminine, which has puzzled experts for years. And he was a bit of an egghead. …. The female form was due to a genetic mutation that caused the pharaoh’s body [...]